So this just happened:

Me: “I’d like to order a pizza to pick up”

Pizza shop: “Sure, what name will this be under?”


“I’m sorry?”

“My name is Jesse”

“Can you say it again?”

(Slowly) “Jesse”

“...That’s your name?”


“Your name is ‘just beef’?”


“Your name is JUST BEEF?”

“..........No? It’s Jesse. Like, j-e-s-s-e”


me: accidentally types a website wrong into the search bar

google chrome, for the rest of my life: you want to go to netfliz? you like netfliz you dipshit? you really sure you don't want to go to today?

*slaps roof of stigma* this bad boy can fit so many Discriminating against someone on the basis of their labels in it

“Gamer Goo” 

“Gamer Goo” 

I just gave my first name to the young person taking bagel orders and they said, "Ah, a vampire name." I'm going to assume that was flirting.

Hi does everyone who signs up for a kink site immediately try to get the screenname “kinkerbell” and if not, why not

After some more conversations, billing for has been officially transferred to the @xoxo org. Many thanks to @andybaio and @andymcmillan for their continued support of this Mastodon server!

As before, I'll continue on as admin and instance maintainer, continuing the work started by @davidcelis.

Intolerable pun 


hey now
it's the end times
get your Frost on
Eliot too

hey now
it's the end times
let's give up now
we're screwed

and all that whimpers can hang
we thought we'd go out with a baaang

SomeBODY once told me
The world will end in fire
Somebody else said in i-ice
From what I've TASTED of desire
I gotta go with fire
But if it had to perish twi-ice -

Well the years start coming but when they stop coming
I know enough of hate to hit the ground running
And say that for destruction it's true
That ice is great and it'll do too


I'm gonna keep posting this until one of you fucking boosts it

Y’all might want to seriously rethink this ad placement

Take me back to the days when I would try to sound smart by casually using adult words like Queue which I pronounced “ka-way-way”

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