I just realized my utter disappointment that I didn't do a PhD.

Because "Doctor Martin Pittenauer" is perfectly singable to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme song.

It took an embarrassing amount of time, but I figured out how to avoid doing a PhD.

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@map The good news: alternate personal titles that serve this purpose could be: Abbot, Elder, Countess, Goodman, Lady, Major, Vicar, Chairman, Fellow, Captain, Herald, Viceroy, Fürstin, Herzog, Kanzler, …

@map Do a doctorate in popular culture about TMNT.

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